Where's God When I'm A-Afraid?/Transcript

This is an episode transcript for Where's God When I'm A-Afraid?

Countertop Segment #1
(We see Rob the Apple and Harry the Banana sitting on the countertop)

Rob: Hey, kids, and welcome to FruityTales. I'm Rob the Apple...

Harry: And I'm Harry the Banana.

Rob: And we're here to answer your questions.

Harry: That's right!

(Rob moves to a giant piece of paper)

Rob: Now today, we got a letter from Bethany Luthor of Princeton, West Virginia, who writes :

Bethany Luthor (VO): "Dear Rob and Harry, I am seven years old. Sometimes, I think that there are monsters in my closet. That makes me real scared. Can you please help me?"

Harry: Oh. I remember once I thought there were monsters in my closet!

Rob: Really? Well, what happened, Harry?

Harry: Well, it turned out that they weren't really monsters at all. Just my fluffy mouse slippers! And they're not so scary... just kind of squeaky.

Rob: Oh I see. Well Bethany Luthor, first check to see if it's just your slippers. After that, watch this story about when Timmy Strawberry got a little bit scared.

Tales of the Crisp
(Fade to a black-and-white scene in a mad scientist's laboratory. We see two shadows moving around on the wall)

Mad Scientist's Assistant: Master. It can't be done. I don't believe you can do it.

Mad Scientist: Well, just stand back and behold as I throw this switch! (beat) It's alive! ALIVE! (laughs manically) Stand!

Mad Scientist's Assistant: Oh my gosh. Look how big it is!

Mad Scientist: Speak!

(We hear a loud groaning noise)

Mad Scientist: Walk to me! No, this way!

Mad Scientist's Assistant: Time to go...

Mad Scientist: Frankenasapargus, where are you going? Come back here!

(The camera slowly pans out as Frankenasargus bursts through the laboratory's door and goes on a rampage. A woman is heard screaming)

Mad Scientist: No, don't go near there! Frankenasparagus, come back! Stay away from those villagers!

(As the camera moves away, we see that we are actually looking at the TV screen in the Celery family's living room. Timmy Strawberry is sitting there, watching the TV. He is smiling at first, but his expression soon shifts to one of fear)

Mom Celery: Timmy? (peeks out from the kitchen) It's time for bed.

Timmy: Just three more minutes.

Mom Celery: But that's what you said three minutes ago. Let's skedaddle up those stairs, your father will be up in a minute to tuck you in. (Timmy goes to the stairs) Besides, I think this show might be a little too scary for you.

Timmy: It's not too scary. I.. I like it. (climbing the stairs) Yeah, I'm not afraid.

(He looks at his family picture and smiles. Suddenly, his family turns into mad monsters with bolts jutting out of their necks. Timmy gets scared and runs into his room. Cut to Timmy lying in bed.)

Timmy: I'm not afraid. (the house begins to shake) It was just monsters... all around me... big growly monsters...

(Rob & Harry suddenly fall right out the ceiling; Bob lands safely on the floor next to Junior's bed, while Larry crashes into the toy chest. Junior jumps out of bed in fright.)

Timmy: Ahh! Who are you?!

Rob: Names Rob. I'm a apple whose here to help you. (Harry starts struggling around in the toy chest as Timmy watches in horror)

Timmy: There's something in my toy chest! It's a monster... It's a big scary lizard... It's... It's a... (Harry pops out with a baby bonnet on his head) Baby yellow pepper?

Rob: Uh, he's a banana actually.

Timmy: Oh.

Harry: Is anybody there? (falls over)

Rob: Over here Harry! Ahem... (to Timmy) We couldn't help but notice that you were just a little bit frightened so the two of us thought we'd drop in and help.

Harry: Yeah! Fear not, for behold: I bring you good tidings and great joy which shall be unto all people, for unto you...

Rob: Ahem! Harry, wrong story.

Harry: Oh, sorry about that. (he smiles)

Timmy: Well I wasn't really afraid, you know. It was just a movie with a big, scary monster... But I'm four years old now, so I can handle it.

Rob: Oh, so you weren't afraid?

Timmy: No, I wasn't scared.

Rob: (looking at Harry suspiciously) The strawberry wasn't scared?

Harry: Not even close.

Timmy: Well maybe just a little bit.

Rob: Oh, just a little bit scared?

Harry: Oh, a little bit.

Timmy: But not too scared.

(Rob and Harry both mumble something to each other)

Timmy: Why? How can you guys help me? I mean... if I was scared then...

Rob: Hm, we were just gonna sing you a little song, that's all. But since you say you weren't scared, we'll just be on our way. (Timmy looks surprised)

Harry: Later!

Timmy: No wait! I guess maybe a little song might be nice... well, since you're in the neighborhood.

Harry: But if you weren't scared, then there's really no reason, so I guess we'll just be going now.

Timmy: (gets angry) Just Sing the song!

Rob: Okay okay, here goes nothing.

(The camera turns on Timmy and the lights dim. A spotlight shines on Rob.)

Rob: (singing) ''You were lying in your bed. You were feeling kind of sleepy... But you couldn't close your eyes because the room was getting creepy!''

(Timmy looks around the room)

Harry: ''Were those eyeballs in the closet? (Three pairs of eyeballs pop out out Timmy's closet.) Was that Godzilla in the hall?''

Rob: There was something big and hairy casting shadows on the wall. (Junior turns around and sees a monstrous shadow and looks panicked.) Now your heart is beating like a drum, your skin is getting clammy...

(At the closet door, several tiny monsters jump out and bounce into the dresser drawers.)

Rob: There's a hundred tiny monsters jumping right into your jammies.

(Timmy looks terrified)

Harry: (speaking) What are you gonna do?

Timmy: I’m going to call the police!

Rob: No. You don’t need to do anything!

Timmy: What? Why?

Rob: Because... ''(singing again) God is the biggest than anyone! He’s the biggest since Godzilla or the monsters on T.V, Oh, God is biggest than anyone, and he’s watching out for you and me! (the song ends)'' Get it now?

Timmy: Um... Well… I… Hmm, well, not really.

Rob: Oh. You see, you don’t have to be afraid, because God is bigger!

Timmy: What? Is He bigger than the slime monster? Because he's a really big monster and he’s kinda scary.

Rob: Next to God, Timmy, the slime monster is like a teeny little cornflake.

Timmy: Really?

Rob: Mmm-hmm.

Timmy: Well, is He bigger than King Kong? Cause he’s the biggest monkey of them all!

Harry: Compared to God, King Kong would look like an itty-bitty bug!

Timmy: Yeah, but King Kong can go ape crazy a lot. Can God go ape crazy too?

Rob: (clears throat) Come over here, Timmy.

(Rob Harry and Timmy bounce towards the window)

Rob: What do you see up there?

Timmy: My windows.

Rob: Ah, no, look out the window. Up in the sky!

(Timmy looks out the window at the starry sky)

Timmy: I can see lots of stars.

Harry: God made all the stars outta nothing! He just went... (blows a raspberry) and there they were.

Timmy: No way!

Rob: Yes way. And He also made the sun and the moon, and even the earth we’re living on right now.

Timmy: Wow! King Kong couldn’t do that. Even if he tried, the city would be destroyed just like that!

Rob: But do you know what else God made?

Timmy: What?

Harry: All the plants and animals, and people too.

Timmy: Wow!

Rob: And that’s why we don’t have to be afraid.

Timmy: Huh?

Rob: You see, Timmy, everything God makes is very special to Him. He made all the little kids and He loves them very much. And because He loves them, He takes extra good care of them. So we don’t need to be afraid because God is always looking out for us!

Timmy: Oh, I get it. So you’re saying God’s the biggest of them all, and He’s on my team!

Harry: That’s right!

Rob: Oh, by the way, there’s someone else who wants to meet you.

(Frankenasparagus suddenly drops from the ceiling)

Timmy: Ahh! It's Frankenasparagus! (hides in his toy chest)

Frankenasparagus: Ah, well, actually my name is Clyde Weston and I’m an actor from Lombard.

Timmy: (peeking out from the toy chest) Wait, what?

Frankenasparagus: Yeah. And I was just pretending to be Frankenasparagus in that TV show. Um, that was my job. And really I’m just a regular guy, and I wouldn’t hurt anybody.

Timmy: Oh,now I get it! ''(singing) So when I’m lying in my bed… and the furniture starts creeping… I’ll just laugh and say “Hey, cut that out!” and get back to my sleeping 'cause I know that God’s bigger, and He’s watching all the while. So when I get scared, I’ll think of Him and close my eyes and smile!''

All: ''God is the biggest than anyone! He’s the biggest since Godzilla or the Monsters on TV. Oh, God is the biggest than the anyone, and He’s watching out for you and me!''

Tiny Monster 1: So, are you frightened?

Timmy: No, not really.

Tiny Monster 2: Are you worried?

Timmy: ''Not a bit! I know whatever’s gonna happen, that God can handle it.''

Frankenasparagus: I’m sorry that I scared you when you saw me on TV.

Timmy: Well, that’s okay, 'cause now I know that God is taking care of me!

All: ''God is the biggest than anyone! He’s the biggest since Godzilla or the Monsters on TV. Oh, God is the biggest than the anyone, and He’s watching out for you and me!''

Timmy: (speaking) One more time!

All: ''God is the biggest than anyone! He’s the biggest since Godzilla or the Monsters on TV. Oh, God is the biggest than the anyone, and He’s watching out for you and me!''

Tiny Monsters: Watching… Watching… Watching…

Timmy: ''Out for you and me! (speaking)'' Yeah!

(Rob, Harry, the tiny monsters and Frankenasparagus suddenly disappear. Dad Celery comes into the room)

Dad: Uh, Timmy, what’s all that racket in here?

Timmy: Sorry, I was just singing.

Dad: Well, your mother and I think that show was a little too scary for you.

Timmy: Yeah, well, maybe, but you know Frankenasparagus is really a guy named Clyde from Lombard. And he’s really not scary at all. And besides, God is bigger than any of them, and even though He doesn’t go ape crazy, He made the whole universe! And He’s taking good care of me too.

Dad: Um… well… yeah, you’re right. We don’t have to worry about things because God is taking care of us. I do think we should be a little more careful about what we watch on television. And you know what? It’s okay to tell us if you’re really scared.

Timmy: Okay. I guess you’re right.

Dad: Sounds like you’ve been doing some good thinking. But it’s time to shut the thinker down now and get some sleep.

Timmy: Okay.

Dad: I love you little mister.

Timmy: I love you big mister.

Dad: I’ll see you in the morning.

Timmy: Alright.

Timmy: (Singing) God is the biggest than (YAWN) anyone. (Snoring)

[The credits appear as the instrumental version of the last part of the song "God is Bigger" plays over it.]

Serious Songs: "The Cebu Song"
(Title card for the serious song fades in. It shows Harry singing and a music stand in front of him. The background is mostly white, with music notes surrounding.)

Announcer (British accent): And now it's time for “Serious Songs with Harry,” the part of the show when Harry comes out and sings a serious song. So without further ado, “Serious Songs with Harry.”

(Harry hops out with an oversized cowboy hat.)

Harry: It's time for The Cebu Song:

(Music kicks in and the singing kicks in.)

Harry: (singing) ''Everybody's got a cebu. / It's so useful that is true. / Oh, where do you get them? I don't know. / But everybody's got a water cebu-oo-ooooooooooooooooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhhhh. / I took my cebu to the barn; / Got his head stuck on some yarn. / Spilled some cheez up till dawn; / Oh, everybody's got a-''

(Archibald Celery hops in annoyed and angered, interrupting the song.)

Archibald: Nope! Nope! Stop right this instant! What on Earth do you think you're doing? You can't say everyone's got a cebu when everyone does not have a water cebu! We're going to get nasty emails saying, "Where's my cebu? Why don't I have a cebu?" And are you prepared to deal with that? I don't think so. Just stop being so seriously silly!

(Archibald hops off and Harry looks at the camera and the serious song title card cuts in.)

Anonymous British narrator: This has been “Serious Songs with Harry.” Tune in next time to hear Harry sing:

Harry: ''Everybody's got a hippo too. / We ride them to the lagoon. / One's was small, and-''

Archibald (screaming): AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!

(Archibald charges in and tackles Harry off-screen. Title card fades away and thus ending the serious song skit.)

Daniel and the Lion's Den
(Daniel and the Lion's Den starts up, Harry is Daniel and Archibald is King Darius with a narrator introducing the story with a camera going from the sea over the lands into the city of Babylon.)

Narrator: Long, long ago, in a far away land, there lived a young man named Daniel. When Daniel was a boy, he was taken from his home in Judah to live in a city called Babylon, where he went to school in the palace of the Babylonian king. Daniel missed his home very much. And every day he prayed that God would take care of his family, and his friends, and look after him, too. God heard his prayers, and helped Daniel become wise as he grew older, until everyone in the palace knew of his wisdom. Then one night, while Babylon was sleeping, the king had a dream.

(Camera cuts to Darius' palace with the first appearance of the Leek as Darius' wisemen as their presence is required. Mozart-esque music starts up and the Scallions and Darius' maidens, stand up straight. Darius bursts the doors open and begins singing.)

Darius: (singing) ''I am King Darius. I've had a dream. And now I'm feeling rather frightened, and I wish someone would tell me what it means.''

Leek 1: ''We are your wisemen. Yes, that is true. And though we're using all our wisdom, we're afraid we can't explain your dream to you.''

Darius: (outraged) What now?!?

Leek 3: ''But there is one who is wiser still, and Daniel is his name. So before you take another sleeping pill, perhaps he can explain.''

(Camera turns to a door behind the leek and cuts closer to the door and Daniel runs into the camera and pops out and smiles at everyone.)

Daniel: (clears his throat and sings) ''My name is Daniel. That much is true. But it is God who gives me wisdom, and through me He will explain your dreams to you.''

(Camera cuts to the maids looking curiously at Daniel.)

Maid 1: ''His name is Daniel. That’s what he said. But when he talks about this “God” of his, I think he's kinda loony in the head.''

Maid 2: I do too.

Narrator: (talking) Well, Daniel was able to explain the king's dream, and this made the king very happy.

King Darius: (back to singing) ''Daniel, you have enlightened me! Your job, I will expand. From now on, I want you to sit right beside me as the second-in-command!''

(Music ends with Darius and Daniel hopping out the court with the Leek jealous.)

Narrator: This was very good news for Daniel, but very bad news for the wisemen. You see, each one of them wanted to be second-in-command. But now that Daniel got the job, the wisemen would have to do whatever he said. This made the wisemen very unhappy, and they immediately started thinking if ways to get rid of Daniel.

(The music for the next song kicks in and the leek begin to dance and sing.)

All: ''Oh, no! What we gonna do? The king likes Daniel more than me and you. Oh, no! What we gonna do? We gotta get him out of here. Oh, no! What we gonna do? The king likes Daniel more than me and you. Oh, no! What we gonna do? We gotta get him out of here.''

Leek 2 and 3: (singing the next verse while Leek 1 still sings the first one) ''We could throw him in the dungeon, we could let him rot in jail. We could drag him to the ocean, have him eaten by a whale.''

Leek 1: ''We could throw him in the Tigris, let him float a while, then we'll sit back and watch him meet a hungry crocodile. Or we'll put him on a camel's back and send him of to Ur, with a cowboy hat without a brim, a boot without a spur. Or we can give him jelly doughnuts, take them all away, or we can fill his ears with cheese balls and his nostrils with sorbet. We can use him as a footstool or a table to play Scrabble on, then tie him up and beat him up and throw him out of Babylon!''

Leek 2: (not singing) How about…

(Camera cuts to an Ariel view of one Leek 2 whispering his plan and the others listening. Camera cuts to the leek showing off their opinions of Leek 2's idea.)

Leek 1: I like it!

Leek 3: It's sneaky!

Leek 1: And it just…

Leek 3: Might…

Leek 2: Work!

All Leek: (back to singing) We could use him as a footstool or a table to play Scrabble on, then tie him up and beat him up and throw him out of Babylon!

(The music goes on with the leek leaving Darius' court and the music ends with the doors slamming shut. Camera cuts to an outside view of Darius's court with the narrator talking into the inside if the court.)

Narrator: The next morning, the wisemen appeared before King Darius to try and trap Daniel with their scheme.

Darius: You wanted to see me?

Leek 1: Ahem. (singing) ''We've got some news, good king Darius. We fear your position is precarious. There are some people here in Babylon who won't give you your due. They’d rather bow to other men.''

Darius: Say it ain't so?

Leek 2: 'Tis true.

Darius: (looking worried) Oh, dear.

Leek 3: We brought a solution of our own design. (pulls out a contract) ''If you'll just sign this paper on the dotted line. It's an edict stating most concisely what we're all to do. We must bow our heads or bend our knees before no one, but you.''

Darius: I see. Ahem. (singing) ''Just one more time, now, let's see if I got this straight. A law to prove once and for all that I am great. If I'm the king then no one must doubt my full supremacy. So from this day forth my citizens will pray to only... …me!'' (not singing) Yes! And if they don't?

Leek 1: If they don't obey, any citizen, will be thrown into the lion's den. (As the camera zooms in, the lighting changes to a red tint.)

Darius: (spoken) Oh! Yes? Well, I guess that would do it! All right then, good work, men! Ta-ta!

Anonymous female singing voice: ''So the law was passed, the deed was done. Daniel's troubles have just begun.''

(Camera shows Babylon through a window and pulls into Daniel's house who we see praying to God.)

Narrator: Everyone in Babylon heard about the new law, including Daniel. But Daniel also new God's law, and God told him that he should only pray to God. And so the next day, just like every other day, Daniel prayed and thanked God for the sunshine and for all his friends. He also thanked God for giving him the courage to do what was right, even when he knew it could get him in trouble.

Daniel: (opens one eye after the narrator talks) You say trouble, right?

(The Leek open the door and catch Daniel in the act.)

Leek 1: Ah-ha!

(The Leek approach Daniel. Scene switches to Daniel now being carried by the Scallions.)

Daniel: So you guys are wisemen? Well that's pretty cool. I mean, have you always been wise, or did you have to go to school for that? Were you serious about that corn dog thing? Hey I gotta get out here.

(The Leek approach the Lions' Den, as the sound of a lion's roar is heard.)

Leek 1: Daniel, because you violated section 4219-2r9-4000-6.1-7...b, of the code of Babylon, forbidding prayer to anyone but King Darius, you are hereby sentenced to be consumed by the lions. Goodbye.

Daniel: Don't I get a phone (They throw him into the lions' den.) caaaaalllllll?!

(The Leek throw Daniel into the Lions' Den and he lands face first.)

Leek 2: Hey Daniel! You're sure gonna have a lot of fun down there! We're not "ly-in". (laughing)

Leek 3: Uh yeah! You better be "ly-in" down... Um... 'cuz those lions are gonna...um..."lie"..."on" you! Ha ha!

Leek 2: What? Mine was funny. Yours was...goofy. Lions are gonna ly-on you?! They're gonna eat him! They're not gonna ly-on him.

Leek 3: Well, well maybe they're gonna lie on him, then eat him. Or one will lie on him while another one, maybe eats him. Or, well maybe one will sit on him...

Leek 2: What? Like the lions are gonna cooperate? Like one's gonna lie on him and say, "Hey, you eat him, I'll lie on him"? Come on, we're the ones that are ly-in, not the lions.

(The Leek push a rock over the den, making it completely dark.)

Daniel: It's actually not so scary down here! A bit musty, not so scary!

(A pair of lion eyes open. As they growl, Daniel backs up and more lions appear.)

Daniel: (gulps and then in the tune of Oh, No! What We Gonna Do?) Oh no! What am I gonna do? It looks like I'm gonna... end up as lion's stew.

(The bright light appears behind Daniel.)

Lady Singing: ''Don't cry, Daniel... Fear not, Daniel... don't you know you're not alone? There is One who is watching you. He listens when you pray. And though it seems this time you won't get through, God has made a way.''

(The lions become more docile.)

Narrator: Even though he still didn't know what to expect, Daniel felt better, when he remembered that God was taking care of him, even in the Lion's Den.

(The Leek are shown celebrating, while King Darius is saddened.)

Narrator: Elsewhere in the Kingdom, the wisemen were busy congratulating themselves for being so clever. While the King, believing that he lost a good friend, decided the only thing that he can do is to pray that Daniel's God would protect him.

(King Darius & the Leek going to the Lion's Den the next morning)

Narrator: The next morning, everyone ran down to the Lion's Den to see what was left of Daniel.

Darius: It's hopeless, no one can survive a night with those lions.

Daniel: (Off-screen) Hello!

Darius: Did you hear something?

Daniel: (Off-screen) Hello!!

(Darius looks into the entrance of the Lion's Den)

Darius: Daniel, is that you?

Daniel: (Off-screen) Oh yeah, I'll be right up. I just have to say good bye to my new friends.

Darius: It's... it's impossible!

Leek 1: Yes, it is.

(Daniel comes up out of the Lions' Den.)

Daniel: Well, hello everybody. See you guys later. Thanks for the pizza!

Leek 3: They had pizza?

Darius: Why, it's a miracle! (singing) ''Surely your God is above all men. Now I understand! For even at the bottom of the Lion's Den, you were in His hand.'' (speaking) I've got it, a new law! From this day forward, everyone will pray only to Daniel's God, no more of this silly praying to me business. But who's idea was that anyway? Oh, oh yes, I remember.

Leek 1: I hear they're looking for wisemen down in Egypt. Been fun, got to go now!

Leek 2 & 3: See ya!

Darius: Where do you think you're going? Come back here, you scoundrels! You scallywags! Not so fast! Stop! I'm the King, you must stop now! Come back here!

(As the story ends, King Darius and Daniel chase the wisemen as Darius orders them to stop.)

(In the very old version, the credits appears.)

Countertop Segment #2
(Camera fades back to the kitchen counter with Bob & Larry on the countertop)

Rob: Wow! That was really neat how God protected Daniel from those lions. [To Harry] And you sir did a very good job.

Harry: Thanks, it was my finest hour.

Rob: We're over here by Coucho to talk about what we've learned today. (While he's talking they hop to him)

Montage Singing: ''And so what we have learned applies to our lives today. God has a lot to say in His book. His holy, holy, holy, holy holy holy, holy book.''

Rob: A- as I was saying we're...

Montage Singing: You see we know that God’s word is for everyone and now that our song is done we'll take a looky, looky looky looky looky looky looky look.

Rob: Ahem! Well, Timmy Strawberry learned that God is bigger anything in the whole world, and because God loves us so much, He's always looking out for us, so we don't have to be afraid.

Harry: Yep. And in the Bible, Daniel learned that God was taking care of him, even down there with those big scary lions.

Rob: That's right! Now let's see Coucho the Toaster has a verse for us today.

Harry: Okay.

Coucho: I've got the perfect verse.

(Coucho pops up has a recipe of Delicious Lasagna.)

Rob: One pound ground beef, three oz of... WAIT A MINUTE. Coucho?! This is a Recipe for Lasagna! That's Not a Verse.

Coucho: Whoops.

Rob: Sorry about that.

(Coucho brings up the verse of Isaiah 41:10)

Coucho: Here you go guys.

Rob: Thanks. And God said in Isaiah 41:10: "So do not fear, for I am with you". Hmm. So the next time you get scared, just remember that verse. And tonight, before you go to sleep, why don't you pray with your Mom or Dad, and thank God for always looking out for you.

Harry: Yeah, that's a great idea.

Rob: Well, that's all for now, until next time. Remember, God loves you so much, and He made you very special. Bye!

Harry: Bye!

(As the credits roll, we see screenshots from the episode.)

(End of transcript)